Boy, I was a head case yesterday. Unable to focus, out of sorts, tense. Not a pleasure to be around in the least.
We went to the RunFar time trial last night. The last time we went, we left the house at 5:00PM and got there a little before 6PM. Yesterday, we left the house at 5:08 and got there sometime after 6:30PM. Traffic was amazingly horrible, which just added to my sense of gripiness. I hate to feel rushed and behind.
We did one loop on the veloway and then hit Mopac. I really felt like I was riding much better than the last time. I’d made a point to eat something before we left because I kind of petered out at the first one. I know I was riding faster up the hills on the front side, at least keeping my speed up and not dipping down to 10mph like before. And I made a much smoother turn at the halfway point as opposed to last time when I had to slow and wait for cars. On the back half, I hit 29mph at one point! I was thinking, “Man, I’ll drop some time and be under 25 minutes!” This lifted my spirits immensely. But NO. I added time…just 30 seconds but still, I’d thought I was doing better. This exacerbated my foul mood. We should’ve done another loop but I just wanted OUT of there. The whole time I’m thinking we need to get back to care for the kid at home but when we got home, I found out he’d gone with his sister to the movie night. We’d had all the time in the world! Like I said, I was just out of it. Nothing clicked. Fortunately, a good night’s sleep seemed to take care of that crap.
I have to really watch myself as I am super competitive. It may not seem it because I don’t race so much any more, but I get very hung up on PRs and performance markers. For example, these 30 seconds. I KNOW that what I am doing is building endurance on my bike and I am doing nothing to improve speed (other than being more proficient), so it should be no surprise that I’m not really burning it up out there. But I will beat myself up relentlessly over this “slip.” Stop it!